Speaking from my own experience, the last thing I wanted to admit was that I had some sort of addiction. After all, Latter-day Saints observe the Word of Wisdom; we don’t have addictions.
It was, however, when I finally came to understand that addiction doesn’t care about the depth of my religious devotion that I was able to see things as they really were. I was a sex addict and had been a sex addict since I was six years old. I had fought it. I had struggled against it. But I was fighting something I didn’t understand and that was so much bigger than I was.
Also in my experience, a lot of the people around me who clearly struggle with sex addiction in one form or another have the same difficulty coming to accept that they have an addiction. We need to admit and accept so we can get well.
I once knew a woman who noticed some changes in her body. Things didn’t look right and things didn’t feel right. She suspected it was cancer, but fear kept her from going to the doctor. She didn’t want to get the diagnonis. She put it off for months until family members finally took her in for a checkup. She did indeed have cancer but it had now progressed to the point that treatment was no longer possible. She died a short time later. Like this woman, denial keeps us in our illness and will eventually kill us.
I have read several lists of questions intended to help the sex addict come to consider the possibility of addiction. Some of them go into some pretty big detail. My questions are simpler:
1. Did you look at pornography in 2011?
2. Did you look at pornography in 2010?
3. Did you look at pornography in 2009?
4. Did you look at pornography in 2008?
5. Did you look at pornography in 2007?
6. Did you engage in self sex in 2011?
7. Did you engage in self sex in 2010?
8. Did you engage in self sex in 2009?
9. Did you engage in self sex in 2008?
10. Did you engage in self sex in 2007?
If you answered yes to three or more of these questions, you should ask yourself this question: “If I know this is wrong and I commit time after time after time that I will never engage in this conduct ever again, why do I still go back to it?” Perhaps you should consider the possibility that you have a problem that is beyond your ability to overcome on your own.
The purpose of this site is not to beat people over the head to get them to accept that they are addicted. Rather, we just want to give you information and instill a sense of hope so you can get help if you feel you need it. Please remember, you can’t recover on your own. We will help you. Email us. We’d love to hear from you.